it still seems problematic to me that the people (not you specifically) change the way they speak to suit an algorithm and not the other way around.

Well I actively hacked at the X-Twitter shadowban algo to prove censorship to the point where my account was not only shadowbanned but shadowblocked. Can’t even log in to delete my account anymore. But I suppose that’s the opposite of what you’re describing.

many people are perfectly alright with using “unalive” and “delete” instead of “kill” or “die” but can’t bring themselves to use trans inclusive language

There’s an important difference, censorship forces people to adhere to synthetic rules. It’s harder to force people to be inclusive or nice.