I date/have sex with who I’m physically attracted to. Otherwise I’m OK if we just stay (non-sexual) friends. Us having stuff in common doesn’t make me horny for them or want to romance them.
If we have nothing in common because of an age gap, then the sexual relationship becomes a reason to learn about them. As long as we agree with each other on politics.
That said I have no expectations, admittedly atm all I’ve been getting is one night stands every once in a while and I’d like deeper relationships (I’m poly). But fuck maybe I just wont get one. shrugs I’ll just keep trying until I get one.
That said, I never really got one-night stands as a thing. If I connected with someone enough for sex, I was typically getting along well enough for friendship.
Had three relationships that ran 2-5 years each before I got married, with a smattering of dating and perennial party girl friends in between.
But it’s so weird to want to hook up, then never see that person again.
That said, I never really got one-night stands as a thing. If I connected with someone enough for sex, I was typically getting along well enough for friendship.
Admittedly, in my case I may be overstating the one night stand nature. I see see most of these women every once in a while out and about and they’re still friendly. However I’d not describe us as friends but more like friendly acquaintances that once had sex who sparsely see each other out in the wild. I’ve not had the chance to get in another major conversation with them and walk to a place after (I don’t live in town but I have an agreement with a friend), so maybe something more might come about but probably not. I think they knew that we did not have much in common and we were just bored and horny.
I think once I move back into town in a month or two this might change. I’ll end up seeing the same faces more often and maybe something can develop out of that more easily. Right now I commute to work, every blue moon hit a local place after work. There might not be enough frequency for solid friendship.
I think once I move back into town in a month or two this might change. I’ll end up seeing the same faces more often and maybe something can develop out of that more easily.
Best of luck. But yeah, the 'burbs are absolutely awful for meeting people who aren’t already settled down. Live in the city with the cool single people! I did that all through my 20s and liked it so much I never left.
I have always been too poor until recently to really afford that until now and I’m not in my 20’s unfortunately.
I’ve been stuck in rural/suburban hell for most of my life because it was what I could afford. I could split a house with roommates easily for cheap rent. And I went to a nerdy sausage fest of a college (before I realized I was bi). I’ll admit I’m trying to make up for lost time now. I feel like I would of had more fun had I done this in my 20’s… but whatever, late is better than never I guess.
TBH, the city I’m going to move to is kind of small as well. Hopefully I can maybe move to a bigger one at some point if I can get a job in a big city someday, but with this economy I think it might be a while.
I’ve been stuck in rural/suburban hell for most of my life because it was what I could afford.
Yeah. I was living in a ratty townhouse inside Houston’s Beltway 8 with no less than four other roommates way back in 2009. It wasn’t always great, but you can’t argue with $300/mo rent. When I moved out with my then-girlfriend, I was immediately paying more than $800/mo. And then rental prices skyrocketed, so we found the first affordable home we could grab and locked ourselves in.
I will say this about roommates. Between the four of us, we were either going to a house party someone knew about or we were hosting one, pretty much every weekend. Great way to meet people.
TBH, the city I’m going to move to is kind of small as well.
Small is relative. You’re in a place with north of 50,000 people and your odds of meeting someone go way up. Live in a big city with 2.4M people and the odds are even better, of course.
But I found a nice little beach volleyball spot about 20 minutes drive from my home. Never had a hard time meeting other people while I was playing.
Yeah it kind of is. Thing is though its almost easy to avoid rightwingers for me, they don’t seem to hit spots I frequent. Men or women.
I can pretty easily look past it mostly if someone is religious (though I may engage in light ribbing because I’m an atheist).
I did have one woman try and uh… “fix” me and my atheism at a bar. She was one of those neopagan “heretic” type crystal people. It was a strange experience trying to discern what the hell she was talking about. She seemed convinced that I understood her religious rhetoric but she was on some kind of advanced reading. She had me hold a crystal she kept in her bag. Admittedly we did not end up going to bed together… She was painfully hot and I was legitimately intimidated by how hot she was and how crazy she seemed.
I kind of hope I see her again because at the very least it was kind of interesting talking to her. Then again IDK I’ll probably continue to be intimidated and nothing romantic is likely to happen between us.
I date/have sex with who I’m physically attracted to. Otherwise I’m OK if we just stay (non-sexual) friends. Us having stuff in common doesn’t make me horny for them or want to romance them.
If we have nothing in common because of an age gap, then the sexual relationship becomes a reason to learn about them. As long as we agree with each other on politics.
That said I have no expectations, admittedly atm all I’ve been getting is one night stands every once in a while and I’d like deeper relationships (I’m poly). But fuck maybe I just wont get one. shrugs I’ll just keep trying until I get one.
Literally all you can ever do.
That said, I never really got one-night stands as a thing. If I connected with someone enough for sex, I was typically getting along well enough for friendship.
Had three relationships that ran 2-5 years each before I got married, with a smattering of dating and perennial party girl friends in between.
But it’s so weird to want to hook up, then never see that person again.
Admittedly, in my case I may be overstating the one night stand nature. I see see most of these women every once in a while out and about and they’re still friendly. However I’d not describe us as friends but more like friendly acquaintances that once had sex who sparsely see each other out in the wild. I’ve not had the chance to get in another major conversation with them and walk to a place after (I don’t live in town but I have an agreement with a friend), so maybe something more might come about but probably not. I think they knew that we did not have much in common and we were just bored and horny.
I think once I move back into town in a month or two this might change. I’ll end up seeing the same faces more often and maybe something can develop out of that more easily. Right now I commute to work, every blue moon hit a local place after work. There might not be enough frequency for solid friendship.
Best of luck. But yeah, the 'burbs are absolutely awful for meeting people who aren’t already settled down. Live in the city with the cool single people! I did that all through my 20s and liked it so much I never left.
I have always been too poor until recently to really afford that until now and I’m not in my 20’s unfortunately.
I’ve been stuck in rural/suburban hell for most of my life because it was what I could afford. I could split a house with roommates easily for cheap rent. And I went to a nerdy sausage fest of a college (before I realized I was bi). I’ll admit I’m trying to make up for lost time now. I feel like I would of had more fun had I done this in my 20’s… but whatever, late is better than never I guess.
TBH, the city I’m going to move to is kind of small as well. Hopefully I can maybe move to a bigger one at some point if I can get a job in a big city someday, but with this economy I think it might be a while.
Yeah. I was living in a ratty townhouse inside Houston’s Beltway 8 with no less than four other roommates way back in 2009. It wasn’t always great, but you can’t argue with $300/mo rent. When I moved out with my then-girlfriend, I was immediately paying more than $800/mo. And then rental prices skyrocketed, so we found the first affordable home we could grab and locked ourselves in.
I will say this about roommates. Between the four of us, we were either going to a house party someone knew about or we were hosting one, pretty much every weekend. Great way to meet people.
Small is relative. You’re in a place with north of 50,000 people and your odds of meeting someone go way up. Live in a big city with 2.4M people and the odds are even better, of course.
But I found a nice little beach volleyball spot about 20 minutes drive from my home. Never had a hard time meeting other people while I was playing.
the new religion
Yeah it kind of is. Thing is though its almost easy to avoid rightwingers for me, they don’t seem to hit spots I frequent. Men or women.
I can pretty easily look past it mostly if someone is religious (though I may engage in light ribbing because I’m an atheist).
I did have one woman try and uh… “fix” me and my atheism at a bar. She was one of those neopagan “heretic” type crystal people. It was a strange experience trying to discern what the hell she was talking about. She seemed convinced that I understood her religious rhetoric but she was on some kind of advanced reading. She had me hold a crystal she kept in her bag. Admittedly we did not end up going to bed together… She was painfully hot and I was legitimately intimidated by how hot she was and how crazy she seemed.
I kind of hope I see her again because at the very least it was kind of interesting talking to her. Then again IDK I’ll probably continue to be intimidated and nothing romantic is likely to happen between us.
I mean, maybe if you’re a stupid person.