I'm back on my BS 🤪

auties usually spot other auties easily

i cannot understand why anyone could sleep at night knowing their value in society is 0.

You gotta switch the cables. I’m assuming right now that you only want what you deserve through your labor. If you have extra or someone else is in need, you would rather they have it than you horde it or gain some luxury. Switch the cables so that what you value is hoarding and having luxuries without any merit. If someone else needs something, your power to not give leftovers to them is confirmation of your self-worth.

Thank you! I am doing better 🙂

Things were cool at my house until my dad showed up when I was in late elementary. Slowly, everything started going to crap. Everyone started fighting and it felt like I was caught in the middle of two social camps that were fighting each other. As things worsened, I started being out of the house more and learning to grow up from friends and the streets. Since those places can be unhealthy sometimes, I would get into trouble doing what I thought was normal. In one of those incidents, I was in severe danger from strangers that were trying to kill me and my best friend. The issue was resolved when someone that saw what was happening called the police who even showed up with a helicopter to find the perpetrators (they got away). My friend and I ran from the cops too because we thought we were in trouble. When I got home the next day after hiding all night, my parents didn’t believe a word I said. Instead, they thought I was having gay sex (wtf, right?) because one of the kids I was hiding with was openly gay. This turns into a huge battle with all the adults yelling at each other. They start yelling at me with threats of punishments. I leave and just hide in my bedroom while the adults lose their minds on each other. My parents tell me that I can’t shut my bedroom door anymore. The day goes by and nothing happens. It’s time to go to sleep, but I hadn’t been punished yet, so I’m thinking something is pending. I used to have no problem sleeping, but this time I can’t fall asleep because I keep waiting for someone to come in since I wont hear the door opening. I figure that if I set up the guitar as described and leave the windows slightly open, it would serve as a warning, wake me up, and maybe I could yell for help and to call police. I’m able to fall asleep, but the guitar drops and I wake up. I stayed frozen waiting to see what will happen. The silhouette freezes too. They slowly and quietly lean the guitar up properly on the wall, walk out, and close the door. I stay awake for the rest of the night, but nothing happened. From then on out, I had mentally divorced my family and saw them as people I had to tolerate and serve as an example of what not to be like.

Thanks for asking.

I get it tho. When I was a teenager, things got so bad in my house that I used to booby trap my bedroom door. I’d place an acoustic guitar on its head with the body up and leaning on the door. If the door was opened, the guitar would fall over and make a loud at noise waking me up and alerting the entire house. It saved me once, and then they never tried again.

I have friend that said it 13 years ago. If you wanna be rich, make yourself the middle man. You can try to open a public company, market it, find investors, and hopefully you’ll eventually run a profit and the stock value will go up. Or, you can be an investor making money by buying stock that provide good dividends and go up in value. But, the best position is in the middle exchanging the stock. You don’t have to convince others to invest and run a company that is successful when competing with others. You don’t have to investigate and guess which companies will be profitable while competing with millions of other investors, banks, and AI. Nope. You just sit back and relax while people fight each other on the battlefield field you created.

Those are the people that make it. They insert themselves in a situation where others fight but they win regardless of who else wins.

• Ford or Chevy? Oil wins
• Chrome or Edge? Google wins
• Facebook or Instagram? Meta wins
• Plaintiff or defendant? Lawyers win
• Pay off home loan or foreclose? Lender wins
• Thousands of IPOs? Market-makers win
• England or France? Rothchilds win
• Russia or Ukraine? Military industrial complex wins

Though I’m not gonna say my name here, I could respond to that thread.

I don’t know how people mess around on the dark web. I used Tor to bounce around onion sites back in ~2011 and learned my lesson. I haven’t been back on since. Eff that. First of all, way too slow and finding sites is a pain. But even when I did find sites, it was too dangerous and creepy. I rather not even know what’s on there. I can get obsessed with how shitty humanity is.

I heard a story about a whole world that was perfect because they locked a kid up in a room and threw all the bad stuff in there with the kid. The poor kid suffered all of the world’s miseries so that others could enjoy life. That kid’s name? 4chan.

4chan is 99% deplorable garbage. I won’t even go into /b/. Helllll no. But oddly enough, some of the internet’s best memes come out of there.

I’d like to tangentially add that Irish people are possible the most chillest when it comes to their ethnicity and identity. About 11 years ago, I got obsessed with pretending I was Irish for a few months during and after dating an Irish-American girl. I had a terrible fake accent, drank Jameson or Maker’s Mark, bragged about my fame with Irish good-bye’s, etc. I am in no way Irish in the slightest, and I don’t think anyone would even think that. Not one Irish person seemed offended. If anything, they welcomed it and found it entertaining at the least. I think that if I did that with any other ethnicity, people would at least be offended if not angry and retaliatory.

Anyone else experience this? If so, any insight on why this may be?

Oh, then what’s the problem?

That is some savage shit. If Eminem were at the table, he would have taken notes.

Edit: I mean, yeah, he did go overboard, but that Israeli guy started it with the stupid ass potato joke. That shit was (1) uncalled for and (2) played out. If the Israeli guy goes to HR, they need to reprimand his ass, too, for trying to being offensive and sucking at it. At least my man here knows how to strike. You want him on your team.

American here. I have never paid rent in cash to a landlord I had a lease with. Only times I have paid in cash was when I was either living with a friend or giving a roommate my part of the rent. It’s possible some people pay in cash, but I would say it is not common.

remember saying no has to have consequences!

• Yep! I’ve put that into practice. Sick of giving everyone the benefit of the doubt. I think I used to give it a lot because I thought I needed it a lot due to my autistic traits missing social cues and whatever implications people took from my statements/behaviors. Lately, I’ve recognized that a lot of what I thought were the impact of my aloof behaviors were actually others shaming me. Previously, I would just assume I messed up and would try to learn social rules from it. Now, I’m at the point that if I say something and someone took it wrong, we can address it collaboratively. But if I’m the one that is expected to make changes to accommodate their perception rather than negotiating a happy middle in which we both make changes, then forget it. I’m not going to be the one that is automatically “wrong” whenever there is a disagreement.

mostly, their words dont fit into their actions.

• Yes!! I learned the acronym ABB: Always Believe Behavior. If someone says something but behaves differently, the behavior is the truth.

look out for key phrases - one might be: "So you are saying? " this is usually followed by a thing you did not say at all.

• I’ve been working on something similar. Basically, I’m tired of people telling me what I mean and more importantly, what my intentions are or why I do things. Thinking back to the people I remember using that phrase often, those people ended up being unbearable to me. Eventually, I would just stay quiet to avoid them taking anything the wrong way, which meant I would stop existing. Sucks I went through all of that, but at least I learned how to use I-statements well!

another might be: “I am so sorry you feel that way.”

• And “you’re too sensitive!” lol. I seriously want a shirt on it that says “I’m too sensitive” to wear it like a badge of honor.

What i do for the “so you are saying” is the following: I bid them politely and soft spoken to repeat the question, as soon as they are past 3 words, I interrupt them really loud and aggressive with: “NO, I DID NOT SAY THAT AT ALL!” then I shut up and stare. I say nothing. the other guy has to say something first. it is a powerstruggle.

• That doesn’t seem like something that would work well with my style of interaction, but I appreciate the example. I rarely talk through implication unless I’m making a ridiculous joke. Aside from underplaying my feelings and experiences, I think I am very direct. So, if someone is asking me, “So you are saying…?” then there is a major disconnect in communication, or we’re back to that “putting words in my mouth” crap. Either way, if that happens infrequently, then it might be tolerable. If it’s a routine thing, then there’s no need to maintain that relationship.

combative, social, competetive, diplomacy or bartering. dont make my mistake, each and every situation was always social for me.

• In the past, I would fawn when I noticed competitiveness hoping that their “win” would cause them to stop it, but I’ve learned that more often than not, they’re never satisfied. The point isn’t to win. It’s to dominate. I’ve done a lot better with combative environments in the past year, so I’m happy with that progress. While I’ve learned to reject combative situations, I have still stayed in for longer than I should have in competitive ones. I’m working on leaving those situations much quicker now though. Lately, I’ve been immersing myself in situations that are collaborative or at the least, understanding. There’s definitely a different feel to it. It’s much nicer and enjoyable. The competitive ones are exhausting.
• Bonus: Hanging around other neurodivergent people has helped me gain perspective by seeing how people treat them. It’s a lot easier for me to see toxic and manipulative behaviors happen from a 3rd person perspective. Once I see it, then it’s easier to recognize when it’s happening to me in 1st person. Bonus from bonus: helps me have a lot of compassion for myself.

ok, I am glad you pulled yourself up by your bootstraps. (figure of speech)

• Thank you, and you too! I appreciate the conversation. I hope you have a nice week also.

I think it’s similar to weights in a gym. Leaving them on the barbell is a jerk move. Returning them to their correct staging location is the ethically correct thing to do. Whenever I see them left on the barbell, I imagine a fantasy where the person has a team of horn players follow them around and play for them to announce their superiority.

wowwwww~ thank you! I’m saving this comment.

Really‽ Can you help me understand how? I’m not offended in anyway at all. I would just like to gain some awareness of how my communication is perceived by others, so I think it would be helpful for me to understand your perspective. I know that people can be reserved because they feel cautious with intercultural topics, so if you feel more comfortable, feel free to DM instead. Whatever works for you 🙂

Yoooo, I’m AuDHD and my father was a raging narcissist (possibly psychopath). Additionally, I’m currently recovering from CPTSD after a hell of a lot of recent emotional abuse. I get the intense emotions feeling invalidated brings up. They’re legit and justified. As a survivor of that insane childhood and environment, it hurts to see others go through it because I know how bad it can be. Other people will never be able to understand it if they even believe you, so I’m sorry you went through that. You were just a kid, and no matter your reactions and behaviors at the time, it wasn’t your fault. It couldn’t have been your fault because it’s all you knew.

Sometimes though, people are only asking a question to gather information and clarify, not build a case against you, imply that you’re “wrong”, and make you look like the “crazy one”. I can’t speak on their behalf, but I think @candyman337@sh.itjust.works was just asking to understand better and didn’t mean anything against you by it. If that’s the case, then while your reaction makes complete sense, you might have better outcomes if you were to practice assessing situations and responding in a way that helps you reach your goals. This would give you more control over your life while compassionately validating yourself. It would also help you avoid the trap that narcissists lay when they trigger you to act out to make you look unhinged. So either way, unless you’re in immediate physical danger, staying calm and collected is the best move.

Also, my intention is merely to help you. I am not trying to insult you, imply fault, or make any judgement on your character. We all make mistakes sometimes (I still make them all the time), so it is completely understandable. All it means is that you’re trying, and that’s something to be proud of considering the history of what you’ve been through. I hope this comment helps you ❤️

I took a music appreciation class in undergrad that had us learn the names of many famous pieces and composers, but Looney Tunes really hooked it up with educating an entire generation on classical symphonic music. Had they included the titles and composers of the pieces in a corner of the screen when playing the music, we’d all be fancy-pants music connoisseurs without taking any college courses for it. There’s a lesson in there somewhere. Imagine what else children could learn if what they find interesting is properly infused with educational material.

one of the classical pieces that often gets used as background music for scenes showing fancy things

Vivaldi’s Spring from Four Seasons?