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balderdash@lemmy.zip to Greentext@sh.itjust.works · 1 year ago

Anon is in the hospital

lemmy.zip

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Anon is in the hospital

lemmy.zip

balderdash@lemmy.zip to Greentext@sh.itjust.works · 1 year ago
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  • idunnololz@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    This would be way funnier if the age was revealed at the end.

    be me
    balls deep in milf
    guy catches me
    drags me out of bed by my foot
    cuts my dick with a knife
    couldn’t walk for 2 years
    0 yo

    • z500@startrek.website
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      1 year ago

      My eyes skipped right over the 0 yo part, and it was quite droll

    • CluckN@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Couldn’t walk for 2 years is a good enough hint that it’s a newborn.

  • Sanctus@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    You just call your own mom a milf…?

    • IndescribablySad@threads.net@sh.itjust.works
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      1 year ago

      Hell yeah, my mom’s a milf. A matriarchal introducer of love and fun.

    • De_Narm@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Just for good meassure I’ve searched the term and it seems like people kind of forgot it’s an acronym. Most definitions just say ‘attractive older woman’.

      • PunnyName@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Which is what I thought cougar described. Kids these days!

        Edit: this has created a short comment chain that I adore…

        • SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          No, a cougar is specifically on the prowl for fresh, young meat.

          • ivanafterall@kbin.social
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            1 year ago

            Where?

            • dohpaz42@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              In your city.

              • baldingpudenda@lemmy.world
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                1 year ago

                THOSE ADS WERE REAL!?

                • Ironfist@sh.itjust.works
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                  1 year ago

                  well, yes! Hurry up! Get your cougar!

        • nieceandtows@programming.dev
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          1 year ago

          I thought cougar was for women actively hunting for prey.

      • This is fine🔥🐶☕🔥@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Even older part isn’t relevant anymore. A 22 year old with a toddler is called milf.

        THAT’S NOT WHAT IT MEANS.

        • shastaxc@lemm.ee
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          1 year ago

          Yes it is, she’s a mother

          • This is fine🔥🐶☕🔥@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            Nope.

            MILF is someone who is considered attractive by peers of her children. Think Stacey’s mom. So the theoretical milf can’t be younger than 30.

            • acockworkorange@mander.xyz
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              1 year ago

              You’re right. American Pie corroborates your findings.

              • This is fine🔥🐶☕🔥@lemmy.world
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                1 year ago

                Of course it does. That was when the word still hadn’t lost its meaning.

    • ObstreperousCanadian@lemmy.ca
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      1 year ago

      His name is Oedipus.

    • Akasazh@feddit.nl
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      1 year ago

      Freud thought so

  • slaacaa@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    I bet you also cried. What a cuck

  • deegeese@sopuli.xyz
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    1 year ago

    Didn’t learn to walk until age 2?

    • EldritchFeminity@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      1 year ago

      What, you think he came outta the pussy drawing Mozart? At age 6, he was born without a mouth.

  • Lvxferre [he/him]@mander.xyz
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    1 year ago

    cuts my dick with a knife

    …what?

    • hemko@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      Male genital mutilation, or Circumcision in American English

      • Lvxferre [he/him]@mander.xyz
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        1 year ago

        Ah, got it. Thanks.

    • Flax@feddit.uk
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      1 year ago

      In America and other Muslim countries, they mutilate the genitals of baby boys upon being born

    • PatFusty@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      First step of being a real man is getting your dick cut clean off. Everybody knows that

      • ivanafterall@kbin.social
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        1 year ago

        A real man would never have had the dick to begin with.

        • SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de
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          1 year ago

          your body is touching a dick 24/7. super gay

    • Lux (it/they)@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      1 year ago

      Circumcision

  • radix@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    what is this google ass font

  • dangblingus@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    1 year ago

    Calls his own mom a milf. Most sane 4channer.

  • NutWrench@lemmy.ml
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    1 year ago

    That is NOT a proper Haiku. 5-7-5, dude!

  • KingJalopy @lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    Been there

  • RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Is the MHLF…his own?

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